I was in Church today. I usually go early in the morning on Sundays, but today I went a bit later, when it is more crowded and the crowd tends to be a bit younger.
What I saw was quite pleasant. There were many pretty girls there. Most were dressed in a way that was not overly sexual, just your basic jeans, sweaters, etc. A few had on shorter skirts, shorts, or tighter fitting shirts. However they were dressed, I enjoyed the vision of these various girls in the pews. The fact that they were in Church showed that they had some sense of spirituality about them, which is something I find attractive, seeing that is an important thing for my own life. I like seeing and meeting girls who are the same. I find a deep spirituality often goes hand in hand with a deep eroticism. I find the photo above combines a sort of spirituality and eroticism, as well as a bit of mystery and intense beauty. I love seeing images of feminine beauty such as this one. In its own strange way it seems almost modest, as if the woman is a bit ashamed to be viewing her pudenda, so she does not open her eyes. It is an alluring photo. It reminds me of how I have known many woman who were shy and self conscious about their own bodies when we first made love, only to become more comfortable once they began to enjoy their sexuality and the pleasure of sex.
As I was noticing the different dressed females, I was thinking how much more attractive a girl is when she leaves more to the imagination. Eroticism is often enhanced through restraint. The mind is our most potent sex organ. I always preferred a girl who dressed a bit more modestly, than one who dressed like a stripper. There is a certain kind of beauty in modesty. Modesty speaks of the allure and intrigue of sexual desire, the what if lying beneath the layers of clothing. For me, the ideal girl is someone who is a bit more modest in public, but a complete freak in bed. When a girl exposes too much in public, less is left to wonder about, since you can probably assume she is quite sexual (and there is nothing wrong with that, and that can be attractive in its own right); but when a girl dresses more modestly, you can wonder in a deeper way what she is like in other ways. Is she sexual beneath those more modest clothes? What is she wearing beneath them? Does she masturbate? Or maybe her modest clothes reflect a lack of sexuality? You just never know with such girls until you get to know them.
Often there are discussions on different religious blogs about how a woman should dress in public. Modesty is always praised as a virtue, but often it can lead to frumpiness and a deficit of beauty. I sometimes even sense some hostility among women to those who dress well. Sometimes I notice different people arguing with each other over who is more modest, and therefore better, more virtuous, and what women should not be wearing (I am waiting for the neo-Traditionalist crowd over at Alte’s blog http://traditionalchristianity.wordpress.com/ to start wearing burkas in an attempt to outdo each other in virtue). They often say they do not want to be a cause of temptation to their male brethren in church. I can understand that, but still, I enjoy seeing feminine beauty, and I particularly enjoy seeing it at Church. For instance, today one girl was sitting to my right, and she was wearing a nicely fitting shirt and jeans. She had an air of sensuality about her. Her hair was long and flowing, thick with curls. She was quite attractive. Another girl was sitting to my left, and she seemed a bit more conservative. Her shirt was not as tight, and although she too had nice long and sumptuous hair, I did not sense the same air of sexuality about her. A few pews up a girl was wearing a very short skirt, almost half way up her thighs, but her legs were quite lovely to see. A little near her was another girl who was wearing a pair of orange shorts, nothing too extreme, but short and complimenting well her butt. It was hard for me not to check them out during the Mass. I checked out the one girl in the orange shorts on my way to communion. I will probably go to hell for that one. It was hard to resist. I was surrounded by many beauties today.
Of course my mind can be downright filthy too. I was having many impure thoughts about these girls. As a matter of fact, I often think about sex at Church, regardless of who is there. In the end I am truly a hopeless case! Oh well…
I like experiencing beauty in different setting, including those where feminine beauty might not as acceptable or understood, such as a Church. I don’t like the idea of women covering their heads in Church. I know many think this is a proper thing to do, but I like seeing a girl’s hair. It is not necessarily a source of evil temptation and lust, nor is it a distraction from my worship of God, but rather, it is something pleasant to see, to enjoy visually, to remind myself of the beauty of God’s creation all around us. And that beauty is all around us, including religious settings, where the mixing of the earthly and spiritual can be a powerful type of otherworldly experience as well.